Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it. ~Mark Twain
Mark Twain was a literary genius and one of my favorite authors. I've lived vicariously through his writings and specifically the adventures of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn more than once. I've also adapted many of his quotes as my daily mantra to help get me through some of life's challenging moments. He truly had the gift of pen and wisdom.
I selected this quote because one of my on-going dilemmas in life is that I worry too much. I'm one of those individuals who has a hard time letting go, ( how many times have I already mentioned this in previous posts), not stressing and just relaxing. I've gone through all of the techniques and still... it's an on-going battle every single day to keep the worry at bay. I'm still relatively young... yes, I have gone through 4 mid-life crisis that I can count... but, in my mind and heart... I'm still very young.... so why am I worrying?
Worrying affects your daily life and your relationships. I believe that it is one of the contributors to destroying being happy and it also is a complete waste of time. Yes, I am saying those words.. yet, I know that it won't stop me from doing the very thing... that I'm trying so hard NOT to do. Does that sound remotely familiar? I have a few friends who know me well... and they have no problem calling me out when I am obsessing over something. To them... I say, THANK YOU for caring about me enough to say... just that.... ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
Worrying affects your daily life and your relationships. I believe that it is one of the contributors to destroying being happy and it also is a complete waste of time. Yes, I am saying those words.. yet, I know that it won't stop me from doing the very thing... that I'm trying so hard NOT to do. Does that sound remotely familiar? I have a few friends who know me well... and they have no problem calling me out when I am obsessing over something. To them... I say, THANK YOU for caring about me enough to say... just that.... ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
It's quite frustrating but most of all, it's exhausting. I've read many articles, other blogs and tried numerous self help techniques to free myself of this burden. One article suggested that worrying comes from living in the past or.. living in the future. First, we can't change the past, so ... in hindsight, we shouldn't dwell on it. We can only learn from it... move forward with a positive frame of mind... and try not to make the same mistakes. Right? Right. Again.... I am saying all of this out loud! Second... we can't predict or control the future. Tomorrow may never come, so why not... enjoy today for every moment we are blessed to have on this earth. I've heard many say that they grew old and knew many many troubles in their life... but most of them never really even happened. I sit here and realize... that's going to be me.
You're probably reading this... thinking... she's really positive and has had such a blessed life and career(s). You're right... I have and I am very grateful. I don't just worry about the big stuff... I worry about the small stuff... the medium stuff... and all the stuff in between. I've tried to sort out... that I should only worry about certain things... or I should only worry when it gets to a certain point... ARE YOU EXHAUSTED yet? The truth is... we shouldn't worry about anything. There is nothing in this life that happens to us that we aren't strong enough to handle or have the faith to know that an answer will present itself. There are always solutions to any problem, situation or question.
So... if I'm saying all of this... I should be able to solve it, right? Well, the truth is... I am working on it. Daily. I know that I can't control everything in life. I can only control my reactions to what happens in life. It's up to me to choose when to react and when to just bite my tongue into and say nothing. I've read a few articles that will tell you that sometimes you become trapped or locked in your own thoughts of worry and fear, that you, really do see the worst happening.
It's easy to blame somebody else for your unhappiness, but... the truth is... we are all responsible for our own happiness. It is up to "me" to determine my course or path in life. If life hands me lemons... whether I make lemonade is "my" choice. I think far too often, we all get caught up with the... "woe, is me" syndrome and it takes somebody close to us to make us realize... GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
Happiness is right in front of our eyes... in many shapes or forms. We don't have to receive anything to be happy. Sometimes, we get caught up in the mind-set that we need "stuff" to be happy. I've heard so many of my friends say... if I had money, or a better job, or if I got a tummy tuck... etc. Reality is.. none of that brings forth happiness. If we are happy, then worrying seems to take less of a priority. I know that this works because there are days when I will wake up and say.... "today will be a happy day" and power of positive thinking... it is. I do believe that when we are happy, things have a way of working themselves out and good things tend to happen to us.
So... worrying. How do you stop? Well, here lately, I am trying a couple of new things that seem to be helping more and more each day. I bought a small notebook that I keep in my purse... and every day, I start a "worry list". I write down all the things that I am worried about at that moment and add to it as the day goes along. This has helped me to know.. that by putting them on paper... I've dealt with them. They are down on the paper... and so , I can tuck them away. (I'm still new at this one.... but it does seem to be helping.)
Second... I am trying to "de-clutter and de-stress" my rituals and life. What? Well, for example... last week I was traveling... and I never check a bag anymore because of the hassles or fear of losing the bag. The stress of having to pack everything in a small bag was ... well, stressful. (I mean, a girl has to have her shoes, right?) This past trip, I checked my bag and wrote on my list... "if my bag gets lost.... what's the worst that can happen? I will have to go buy clothes and a toothbrush."
Thirdly, taking time each and every day to find something to be happy about that cost absolutely nothing. Today... it was the trees. I sat for about an hour under a huge oak that I have and thought... how beautiful this tree is and how sturdy and strong. The more I examined and appreciated the tree, my mood and disposition became cheerful and happy inside.
Fourthly, I've made a firm commitment to stop worrying, be happy and just let the chips fall where they may. Yes, I've made the commitment before... and little by little... I am making progress. I am trying to stop myself... before the worry takes control and evolves into something bigger. I don't always win... at this task, but... I can keep trying until I get it right. If I can do it... anybody can do it.
Lastly, I've always considered myself a giving and generous person and I want to continue being that person. I know that giving and being generous can be something as simple as a kind word, a thank you, a gesture to help by giving of yourself. A friend of mine recently posted something on their facebook page that really hit home with me: "Be the type of person who goes the extra mile... NOT just the extra block." Wow! Isn't that something to ponder?
So... back to my original thoughts and kudos to Mark Twain... who for now... will help me with my worries and stress, by taking me on a raft or down a river... to another time and place... where I have NO worries. I have NO plans. I have nothing but time to enjoy... word after word... page after page... of a literary genius at his best.
You're probably reading this... thinking... she's really positive and has had such a blessed life and career(s). You're right... I have and I am very grateful. I don't just worry about the big stuff... I worry about the small stuff... the medium stuff... and all the stuff in between. I've tried to sort out... that I should only worry about certain things... or I should only worry when it gets to a certain point... ARE YOU EXHAUSTED yet? The truth is... we shouldn't worry about anything. There is nothing in this life that happens to us that we aren't strong enough to handle or have the faith to know that an answer will present itself. There are always solutions to any problem, situation or question.
So... if I'm saying all of this... I should be able to solve it, right? Well, the truth is... I am working on it. Daily. I know that I can't control everything in life. I can only control my reactions to what happens in life. It's up to me to choose when to react and when to just bite my tongue into and say nothing. I've read a few articles that will tell you that sometimes you become trapped or locked in your own thoughts of worry and fear, that you, really do see the worst happening.
It's easy to blame somebody else for your unhappiness, but... the truth is... we are all responsible for our own happiness. It is up to "me" to determine my course or path in life. If life hands me lemons... whether I make lemonade is "my" choice. I think far too often, we all get caught up with the... "woe, is me" syndrome and it takes somebody close to us to make us realize... GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
Happiness is right in front of our eyes... in many shapes or forms. We don't have to receive anything to be happy. Sometimes, we get caught up in the mind-set that we need "stuff" to be happy. I've heard so many of my friends say... if I had money, or a better job, or if I got a tummy tuck... etc. Reality is.. none of that brings forth happiness. If we are happy, then worrying seems to take less of a priority. I know that this works because there are days when I will wake up and say.... "today will be a happy day" and power of positive thinking... it is. I do believe that when we are happy, things have a way of working themselves out and good things tend to happen to us.
So... worrying. How do you stop? Well, here lately, I am trying a couple of new things that seem to be helping more and more each day. I bought a small notebook that I keep in my purse... and every day, I start a "worry list". I write down all the things that I am worried about at that moment and add to it as the day goes along. This has helped me to know.. that by putting them on paper... I've dealt with them. They are down on the paper... and so , I can tuck them away. (I'm still new at this one.... but it does seem to be helping.)
Second... I am trying to "de-clutter and de-stress" my rituals and life. What? Well, for example... last week I was traveling... and I never check a bag anymore because of the hassles or fear of losing the bag. The stress of having to pack everything in a small bag was ... well, stressful. (I mean, a girl has to have her shoes, right?) This past trip, I checked my bag and wrote on my list... "if my bag gets lost.... what's the worst that can happen? I will have to go buy clothes and a toothbrush."
Thirdly, taking time each and every day to find something to be happy about that cost absolutely nothing. Today... it was the trees. I sat for about an hour under a huge oak that I have and thought... how beautiful this tree is and how sturdy and strong. The more I examined and appreciated the tree, my mood and disposition became cheerful and happy inside.
Fourthly, I've made a firm commitment to stop worrying, be happy and just let the chips fall where they may. Yes, I've made the commitment before... and little by little... I am making progress. I am trying to stop myself... before the worry takes control and evolves into something bigger. I don't always win... at this task, but... I can keep trying until I get it right. If I can do it... anybody can do it.
Lastly, I've always considered myself a giving and generous person and I want to continue being that person. I know that giving and being generous can be something as simple as a kind word, a thank you, a gesture to help by giving of yourself. A friend of mine recently posted something on their facebook page that really hit home with me: "Be the type of person who goes the extra mile... NOT just the extra block." Wow! Isn't that something to ponder?
So... back to my original thoughts and kudos to Mark Twain... who for now... will help me with my worries and stress, by taking me on a raft or down a river... to another time and place... where I have NO worries. I have NO plans. I have nothing but time to enjoy... word after word... page after page... of a literary genius at his best.
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