8 minutes and 46 seconds..... why it matters

8 minutes and 46 seconds.   Doesn't seem like a very long time, does it....or DOES it?   It’s already July and the last few weeks of May and the whole month of June have been filled anxiety, tension and to be honest..... anger.    Yes, we have still been dealing with the aftermath of the coronavirus.... and the restrictions and feeling the economic fall-out from it.   We have watched the lowest unemployment in the history... flip to be the highest.  We have watched as our once US economy that was booming and soaring.... render itself lifeless.  Now.... in the aftermath of all of that.... we are dealing with yet another crisis.   This crisis is one of a different kind.  The crisis of race.  Black vs white.  Black vs yellow.  Black vs. orange.  Basically... black vs anything.... Wait... are you sure?   Yes.... I am sure, that racism is alive and well.... and it still rears its uglyiness to remind us of how far we have come..... yet, how far we have to go.  

It’s taken me awhile to actually write this post... because..... I wanted to make sure that from an emotional writing, it was my thoughts and not my anger that eventually, showed through the words.   By now, everyone knows the name, George Floyd.   If not, they have been living under a rock.   Floyd, an African American man was arrested, detained and held on a sidewalk... handcuffed face down... with a Caucasian police office kneeling, placing his left knee between the mans neck and head, with pressure to his back.  There were 3 other police officers witnessing this scene along with bystanders.   The police officer.... held this man in this position for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.  Now... does it seem longer?   

What matters... is he was arrested, in handcuffs, lying face down... and already in custody.   What MATTERS is during this 8 minutes and 46 seconds, George Floyd repeatedly stated “I cant breathe” .  During this 8 minutes, 46 seconds.... Floyd, repeated stated, “please” and he couldn’t breathe.   It was apparent from all videos, the man was in distress.  George Floyd, called out for his mother.   George Floyd had bystanders stating he was in distress to the officers... with their response being, he’s fine.  

George Floyd became non-responsive about 6 plus minutes into this stance, and bystanders again, urging the officers to check his pulse.  One of the officers, checked and could not find one.   8 minutes and 46 seconds later, the arresting officer removed his knee from Floyds neck.  Floyd was motionless.  He was rolled onto a gurney and taken by ambulance.  George Floyd was pronounced dead about an hour later. 

In the aftermath of George Floyds death, protests around the country ignited for police brutality against African Americans.  The first protest held in Minneapolis, where the incident took place, took a turn for the worse, as a peaceful protest quickly turned into a riot, with the streets of Minneapolis being vandalized and police cars and the actual police station poetically decorated with graffiti - all for George Floyd.  (Or was it.....) 

It seems in the days that have passed since George Floyds death, some progress on this conversation regarding the treatment of ‘African /Americans could have been another opportunity to bridge the gap and to help find solutions.... instead, the days and terror filled nights have many disturbed that there is political trickery involved... with activists and Antifa riots being held in major cities across this country and being destroyed .... all in the name of George Floyd.   The memory of George Floyd and his final 8 minutes and 46 seconds are being lost in the message because of these rioters.  

Floyds family have called out for peace.  Many of the peaceful protesters have taken a stand against these rioters... but the end result is .... many of our cities have been destroyed and are having to be put back together piece by piece.  Now... all across America.... statues are being vandalized.  History, seemingly erased... and the conversation.... seems to get lost because the focus is not where it needs to be.  

8 minutes, 46 seconds.   Think about setting a timer.... and having a conversation about race.... with someone everyday for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.   What could you say?   What would you say?   The reality is... until we all look within ourselves....and realize that as human beings.... we all need to do better. ... nothing will change.   Recently, a friend of mine posted this... and it really hit home.  A child made the statement.... “if we dont care about the color of someone’s eyes, why should be care about the color of their skin?”.   The innocence of a child....who has nothing in their heart, but what they are taught will grow up to love one another, regardless of the color of someone’s skin.   

8 minutes, 46 seconds.   A conversation about race.  About inclusion.  About diversity.   Not sure its enough time..... you’re right, its not... but, its a beginning, its a start and it would serve the tragedy of Floyds death, far better than rioting, looting and tearing down Americas cities.  

There have been many calls to defund the police.  Get rid of the police.  Think about that for a moment.  Simply take a moment... and think what would happen to our country, if there were NO police.   As a society, it seems easy to judge a whole category based on the actions of 1.   But, its wrong.   NOT all police are bad.  

There are those who would argue that law enforcement treat those of skin color differently.   I am not a police officer, nor am I black... so honestly, I do not know, but the conversations that I have had with my black friends.... is one that is alarming.   I am a worrier, by nature.  I worry about everything.  My kids are grown adults and I still worry about them.  I worry about my grandson... but as I thought about the things I worry about... it hit me, that as an African American, they are worrying about things...that we take for granted.  Simply, walking out the door... 

I did look up deaths... and there were 19 white deaths and 9 african american in the last year from police.   So... why the outrage... why the conversation.  Martin Luther King, Jr. Was a great man and brought forth major change when it came to the African American community.   His words resonated and he brought unity of communities.  Racial division has long been part of the history of this great country.   Right or wrong, it was there in the past and tireless hours and been given to bring forth great change.   You would think in this day and time.... we would not be having these conversations.  But... the stark truth is.... racism still exists in this country. It exists in individuals.  It exists in hearts.  The way to create change is through conversations followed with actions that matter.  Not riots.  Not destroying our cities and communities.  So.... every day.... for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.... have a conversation with someone on how, together, we can all work to treat one another equally.   Set your timer.... you may find, its the most productive time you’ve spent in a while.   For those that want a better tomorrow and to really bring forth change..... it doesnt happen overnight.... and we cannot erase history.... nor should we.... we should learn from history and realize that without it, we would not be here.... but, just because it is history, doesnt mean we have to repeat it.  

8 minutes and 46 seconds.  Yes... it mattered then and it matters now.    

Topsy Turvy and Life’s Pause

As I sit and try to absorb the thoughts swirling in my head... it’s hard to imagine, that suddenly, without warning life turned topsy turvy and everything that we knew.... paused.  For years, we have dealt with outbreaks of influenza that affect our schools and communities... and doctors ask us... to get the flu shot every year, or if your child comes down with it.... keep them home until they are no longer running fever.   In 2008 or was it 2009, there was an outbreak of a different strain of a virus, they named Swine Flu.. that impacted many globally and the United States.

In January... there was some news about another strain of a virus that at the time, they referenced it as the Wuhan virus, (then later it was referenced as coronavirus and now simply COVID-19),  because it originated in Wuhan, China.   It was mainly affecting China in late November/December and the US had not seen any cases.   In mid January, around January 12, 2020, there was a reported case of Covid-19 in Seattle, WA.  It was said that the person who had it, had been in Wuhan, China.   From January 12, to January 29, Seattle became a bit of a hotspot with the number of cases growing.   At the time, there was no testing being done for Covid-19, so it is difficult to know if the number of cases were accurate, but according to the CDC website, it looks as if there were around 50 plus by the end of the month.   With the cases, growing, The President of the United States, shut the borders to/from China at the end of January.  

Covid-19 is an enemy.   It has perpetrated our society, and along with the media and the fear they have instilled, we are now living in a pandemic.   Now... before I continue writing... I want to insert a little history here.... just for the sake .... of clarification on how this enemy came to be.

  The news report stated that it had come from a  “wet” market here.    Now... I have not been to China, nor have I seen a “wet” market, but just the phrase bothered me.
(For the record... for those who do not know.... wet markets sell fresh vegetables, fruit, seafood and meat.) Think of it as a “farmers” market, that is probably more extensive with it’s open-air stalls.   Some of these “wet” markets actually sell and slaughter live animals on site.   It is rare for one to sell wild animals and their meat... but, the wet market in Wuhan (Huanan market) did have a wild animal section where you could purchase snakes, beavers, porcupines, and baby crocodiles among other animals.   The term “wet” came to be because of the liquid within these markets;  live fish splashing in tubs of water, or melting ice keeping the fresh meat cold, the innards of the slaughtered animals.... and another reasoning was that they deal with perishable goods (thus wet) instead of dry, durable goods.   (One thing to note is that wild animals used for food can lead to disease.   They have been proven to be linked to disease outbreaks in humans, including Ebola and HIV).   It may not be a stretch to believe that the coronavirus may have jumped from animals to people.   People that buy slaughtered wild animals is one way for an animal-borne disease to infect people.  If these animals are already sick, or kept in dirty, cramped conditions like stacked cages, then again...viruses can be present when animals are under duress.  These viral pathogens can intermingle, swap bits of their genetic code and even mutate that might make them more transmissible.  For respiratory diseases, like coronavirus, the virus can jump to food handlers or customers through exposure to an animal’s bodily fluids.  ****   For disclaimer purposes, I am NOT a doctor, nurse or any field in healthcare.   But... I did look up and do a little research on where this particular virus came from because I really wanted to know... how something from Wuhan, China could create the current situation that every American is living in.

Now... that we’ve had our history lesson.... which honestly... is something that we should know because as you begin to learn about this virus.... we all need to understand, it did not originate in the United States.  It was contracted from an individual or individuals who were overseas and hopped on an airplane and brought it into the US.

Now... Just to give more backdrop... and again, just so anyone who may have been under a rock... knows, the House of Representatives had impeached the President of the United States.  There were a number of hearings and then the House Judiciary Committee began on December 4th and on December 13th, it was voted on for 2 articles of impeachment.   Now... typically, once articles have been voted on, the Speaker would send them within the next few days.  Not this time and you’re probably wondering what this has to do with a virus... well.... I’m getting there.   The Speaker sat on the articles and did not send them to the Senate for 15 plus days.  The Senate trial finally began on January 16th and it ended on February 5th, when the President was acquitted.     During the month of January and February, the news coverage was impeachment mania.   There was very little information or reports on coronavirus with the exception to report what was going on in China.

Now..... by mid February, with the impeachment done, the news turned its attention to the virus but it wasn’t until March when it was apparent that Covid-19 was an enemy.   On March 13, 2020, our life paused.  Most of the school age kids were out for spring break.  Little did they know, it would be the longest spring break they have ever had... and are still having as of this writing.

The world turned TOPSY TURVY and ... everything in your normal routine .... was no more.  Life Paused.

The President of the United States declared a national emergency and the WHO and CDC confirmed that the coronavirus was a pandemic.  NBA cancelled basketball games.  MLB cancelled baseball games, the NHL season was cancelled,  NASCAR cancelled races and in the days that followed, every major sporting event was cancelled or postponed  including all PGA events, including the Masters and the Kentucky Derby.  Following those lines.... conventions, meetings and events were cancelled or postponed.  Major festivals were cancelled like Coachella, Stagecoach and more.   It started with no events with more than 250 people, then a week later, it was no more than 50 people and now... it currently stands that you can not have a gathering of no more than 10 people.

 In the weeks that followed, government mandates came down to shelter in place either from a local level or from a state level and that only ‘ESSENTIAL’ businesses could remain open.  The definition of essential still bothers me, because to me... every business is essential if it is providing a paycheck to feed a family.  What was essential?   Grocery stores, pharmacies, hospitals (but they were solely focused on Covid-19 for the most part) and car repair and parts.     Churches were closed and services went online.  There were several that got creative and did drive up services, but never in my lifetime, I had I heard of a church being closed.

Schools and universities were shuttered and kids... were left in limbo for a couple of weeks, and then distance learning and online classes were quickly put into play.   For businesses considered non-essential, ZOOM and Go-to Meetings became the “new norm” as best as it could be considered a new norm.  Parents were suddenly thrust home with their children, trying to work from their homes as well as home school.   Topsy turvy and the world kept spinning.

Movie theatres, gyms, casinos, hotels, bars and many restaurants were closed.   They limited restaurants to curbside pick-up, drive-thru or delivery for those that could manage it.  People were without jobs and unemployment rose to an all time high and is currently still rising.   State parks, campgrounds, beaches and parks were all closed.   Those who had family members in the hospital, could not visit.  Those who had family in nursing homes, could not visit.    Basically, the only area where you could move about was your house, your yard or a walking trail.  

Airlines and airports were empty and the few travelers that were flying were on “essential” business for the most part.  Trains were stopped.  Buses were stopped.  There was nothing operating with any groups of people on it.  The cruise line industry was hit hard... with several ships having massive outbreaks of the virus, which created, more panic.

WASH YOUR HANDS became a mantra, a series of sing-a-longs and every social media posts for weeks was about the 20 second hand washing tutorials.   The grocery stores, became, empty due to the fear and the panicked who rushed to get toilet paper, hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes and suddenly.... whatever you thought you knew... you no longer knew.  

Suddenly, our days were filled with daily briefings, the demand for ventilators, PPE equipment, testing, vaccines and answers.   A coronavirus task force was put in place and suddenly and rapidly, testing ramped up and we were hearing from the director of infectious diseases every day.   Dr. Fauci, became a household name as well as the recent muse of a SNL skit where he was played by Brad Pitt.

After the first few weeks went by, and the shock initially wore off, families began to realize the hardship of being in a pandemic and the mandates.   Social distancing became the new “it” and staying 6 feet away from each other was the protocol.  We kept hearing that we had to stay home to “flatten the curve”.   We had to stop the virus in its tracks.   Wearing masks became fashionable... and .. well, maybe not so much, but they are now mandated attire.  Life paused and suddenly and abruptly, you became very aware that it would not go back as it once was... life had forever been altered and changed.... and with it... each of us.

For me, personally, my office is at my house, so working from home has not been that big of a hardship.   I travel a lot.... so not being able to go and do what I would normally do... has bothered me.  The big thing for me was having to postpone my conference until the Fall.  It’s still a day by day learning.   Our industry was shuttered... many of my colleagues lost their jobs or were furloughed.   My customers and clients were sitting at a standstill.   While we sat still, the coronavirus kept raising in numbers of those affected.     I started weekly Zoom Happy Hours to connect with customers and clients, so that we could support one another.  It was pure joy seeing their faces on March 25th... after we had been quarantined for 3 weeks.  After the first one, we decided that we would have one every week.... just to have positivity and a way to check in and share information on our industry.   We were all struggling and hurting and not knowing how or when... we would return to our lives.

I have not traveled since February 26th.. which is the longest I have gone in over a decade without a business trip.   This week, is week 6 of quarantine.   And this week... we started seeing a little light at the end of the dark tunnel we have been in.   Some of the restrictions were eased.. with some of the retail stores being allowed to open but proper protocol - social distancing and in my small town, masks are required to enter.   In some states, restaurants have started allowing dine in services again, but its too early to tell how, these new protocols will affect the overall dining experience.

Topsy turvy and we continue to hope and pray that we are to the flattening stage and that life can get back to normal.  My niece is a nurse at our local hospital in the ICU step-down.  For the last 4 weeks, I have worried constantly about her... her physical stress, her mental stress.... and emotionally, how taking care of those sick with this virus, might affect her.  She sent me pics with her full PPE on and honestly, she looks like something in a futuristic movie.

Every day, my thoughts run the full gamut.   Angry, confused, worried, sad, depressed, happy at times and then just stressed.   I worry about the impact this will have on my grandkids.  Lane, who is 11, is in the 5th grade and while he seems to have adopted to his “online classroom”, I cant help but think he would rather be at school seeing his friends.  Little League Travel Ball cancelled and that is his heart and soul... and for me, watching him.    John-Richard, is 18 and a senior.  The last 2 months of his senior year spent in quarantine.   A virtual graduation... and a small intimate one with only 5 family members and not the rest of his classmates.   No senior skip day, no senior parties and his final year on the high school baseball team abruptly ended.   Both have adapted, but again... emotionally, how are they really holding up.  

As we move into May and looking at the summer, what will our lives look like in 6 months.  Will our world be uprighted and the topsy turvy get back in sync.   I’ve thought a lot about everything that has been going on and the society that we all live... and I am a firm believer in all things happen for a reason.   I believe God is trying to tell all of us.... to stop, and pause.   Maybe we’ve all moved away from Him to the point, that He needed to get our attention again.   Maybe, we have put too much emphasis on things that honestly, get in the way of the things that should be the most important.  Whatever the reason, during this life’s pause, I have found myself.... sitting on my front porch, enjoying the ending of every day and the canvas that God has created with beautiful sunsets.   I have watched my flowers bloom and little birds hatch... and I have spent more time appreciating my life... and knowing how truly blessed I am.   Hitting reset... sometimes isn’t easy... but all of us have the opportunity to take this as one big reset and do better in the days ahead.

We’ve lost life to the coronavirus.  Many have been sick and many have recovered.   I took the antibody test this week because there were many who had it and had no symptoms.   With as much as I travel, and am around sick people on planes, I wanted to ease my mind a little.   I haven’t gotten the results and even if I test positive that I have the antibody, there are no guarantees that you’re immune to it and won’t contact it again.

So for now.... we look forward to each day, with more and more of our lives opening back up... with caution and care.   Every day, our new mantra is to wash your hands often, use hand sanitizer and wipes and limit where you go.   Yes, we are still topsy turvy and life’s pause is still happening... but the one thing we can all do every day... is pray.

Stay safe and God Bless You.

Paris in 3 Days... Yes, it is Possible.

Early December, I found myself short of some MOD’s that I needed to retain my medallion/elite status on my preferred airline.  Anyone who travels a lot will understand that once you reach a certain level, you don’t want to leave it if you don’t have to.... and it had taken me a long while to reach the top tier with Delta... so I knew I had to make plans for a short trip to retain my status.  Where to go?

I thought about criss-crossing the US to see if I could make it that way, but then saw a fare alert for Paris, France.  It was in first class.  It was too good to be true, right?   I looked on the website, saw the fare, and within an hour... I was booked for a short 3 day trip to Paris.   I was giddy for several reasons... first, at having found such a deal... second, it would push me over what I needed to retain my status for 2019 and third, and the best .... was I had never been to Paris.  I have traveled Europe and all around but for some reason, Paris had always escaped my destinations.

So... for those wanting to know if you can actually enjoy a trip abroad in 3 days, the answer is yes.  While I would have loved to have been there a week or two, I made the most of the journey..... packed with all of the highlights.  So... how do you decide what to see in a short period of time... here are my tips:

1.). Research.   Paris has so much to do and see, that I knew in 3 days there was no way to do it all, so for this quick trip, it had to be strategic.  I narrowed down the list to those that were a MUST for me on this first trip.  My picks were the Eiffel Tower; Notre Dame; The Lourve; Versailles; French Bistro; Arc of Triomphe; Champs-Elysees and House of Chanel.

2.). Tickets.   I went on all of the sites looking at tickets, length of visits, options and knew that with a couple of my choices that I would only hit the "highlights" because The Louvre alone could take you a week if you wanted to really see every single item and spend an adequate amount of time at each item.

3.). Tours.  I had learned from previous trips that one of the keys to any successful trip is to book the right kind of tour.   I learn from mistakes having booked a 15 hour tour in Iceland.  So... this time, I did my homework.   I reviewed several tours and I also read all of the reviews.  I discovered that in Paris, it is a MUST to purchase "skip the line tickets" or "buy tickets as part of a group" so that you are not standing in a 2-3 hour line to get in.  This is definitely a key tip for all of the museums and the Eiffel Tower.

4.). Organization.  Once I knew which tours I wanted to do, I began to organize the agenda of the trip.  Since flying into Paris... you arrive early in the day, I knew that the first day there would be long.... so I decided that the Notre Dame and The Louvre would be the 2 places to visit on Arrival Day.  (Now, this may sound kinda crazy, but, they are in close proximity of each other and I knew that at The Louvre, I was going only to see my "MUST" see list.   The second day was The Eiffel Tower. This was the reason I wanted to come to Paris in the first place, so I really wanted to make the most of having a good night’s sleep on day 2.   I booked a group tour that included Lift Tickets to the Sommet (the top of the Eiffel Tower) along with Lunch at Tour 58 Eiffel which is on Level 1 of the Tower, followed by a Cruise along the Seine and Tickets for the Hop On-Hop Off Bus.   The 3rd day of the trip was a trip to Versailles.  This would be a full day, so I wanted to make the most of it.  Then on day 4, it was a trip to the airport for the trek back across the Atlantic.

5.). Now, that my agenda was in working form, I went online, purchased my tickets and tours and got everything together in the order that it would occur.   I would definitely recommend Get Your Guide Tours, especially for the Eiffel Tower and Versailles.  Both of these were exceptional.

6.) Lodging.  One of the key things is determining where to stay and in what area it is located.  I wanted to be near the Eiffel Tower and found a great hotel that offered a view of the Tower from one it’s rooms.  I booked the room on points and cash so I didn’t feel the least bit upset by getting the upgraded room to be able to look out and see that beautiful site.

7). Dining.  This to me was not something that I necessarily wanted to plan, but I did want to know a little about the food so I did take some time to familiarize myself with some of the key offerings in Paris.  My dream of sitting in a French Bistro sippin’ a glass of wine overlooking one of the Parisian streets became a reality and I could not have been happier.   For dinner, there were so many options near the hotel that I had selected that we walked every night to a different one.

After the planning, booking and reading all about the City of LIghts... the time quickly came to go and enjoy the trip.

Patriotism and Pride... Don’t Let it Slip Away.

America.  God Bless America.  Grand Old Flag.  My Country Tis of Thee.  The Star Spangled Banner.  

What do they mean and what purpose will they serve in the future of our children and grandchildren?  As I reflect on my own childhood, I am standing in 2nd grade facing the blackboard with my hand over my heart looking at the American flag proudly displayed in the corner of the room.   Every voice is in unison and every stance is of respect.  I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America.    Even at 7 years old, I knew the words.  I recited them every day before starting class for most of my elementary years.  I grew up with two parents who worked hard every day from 8 - 5 to provide for their 3 children.   I grew up in a family where both of my parents felt it was an honor to cast a vote.   I grew up going to the political rallies to hear the candidates and then to have hearty discussion over who’s views were more in line with my parents beliefs.  I grew up knowing that in local elections, you didn’t necessarily vote for a particular party, but you voted for the best person for the job.   I grew up knowing that for the presidential election... you voted for the party affiliation that you felt most in line with your own values and views but also for the person who you felt would lead our country for the next four years.  

As I entered high school and college, the political process started to make more sense as I learned more about the branches of government, the history of the Constitution and all of the values that our forefathers had written for our country to succeed.  I was enthralled with the history of America and even when I had children of my own, there was nothing I loved more than to help them with their projects in this particular subject.  One of my fondest memories, was taking vacations to Branson, Missouri with my family and my parents... going to the family shows where they would sing and dance.  There would always be a segment where they sang songs of patriotism and they asked all of the military and their family to stand and they would thank them for their service.  I will never forget the look on my Dad’s face and my husband’s at the time, as they both stood... and the tears that I felt... stinging to my face watching them.  They were not tears of hurt or pain, but of joy and pride knowing that my Dad and my husband had served their country and were so proud.  I looked around the theatre at all the men and women who stood with their families, and you could feel what being an American meant.  

Now... 3 careers later and adult children making their own way in the world.... I sit perplexed as to what has happened to our country.  I sit wondering what happened to our classrooms.  I sit wondering what happened to our respect.  Every person, regardless of race, creed, gender or religious affiliation has an opinion.  They have always had an opinion.  We have learned from history and we have made changes along the way but somewhere in the midst of those changes, we have steered away from teaching our children how to respect and value the country that we are blessed to live.  Every day, we wake up to a brand new day..... and we all have an opportunity to make each day better than it was the day before... but somehow.... we have thrown away some of the essential tools that our children and our grandchildren need.  

In a conversation with my 10 year old grandson, I asked him if he knew the words to the pledge of allegiance.  He did.  I asked him if he knew the words to The Star Spangled Banner.  He did.  I asked him if he knew the words to Grand Ole Flag... he did not, although he said he had heard me sing it before.  I asked him if he knew the words to America, My Country Tis of Thee and several other patriotic songs.  Again, the answer was no, I don’t know the words but I have heard of them.  This bothered me more than I can say.   Those songs have meaning and purpose.  Why have we stopped singing them?  Why have we stopped teaching our children that is is absolutely NOT okay to sit during the national anthem?   

Last year, a professional athlete walked into a stadium and made a choice to kneel during the playing of the national anthem.   The professional athlete stated that he was protesting to bring awareness to the social injustice of African Americans and minorities by law enforcement.  He stated that he was not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color.  Now, please take a few moments and ask yourself this question.  If you have a job, that you are paid to do, and you are on the clock and you walk in and start a protest, would you be allowed to stay on the job or would you be suspended or fired?  Secondly, knowing that a professional athlete is a role model, would you allow the opportunity to use the job as a platform knowing that millions of kids, as well as adults are watching with many of those individuals have parents, siblings, relatives who are in law enforcement.  Some... at the very game protecting the fans, the players and the coaches where this athlete kneeled.  Third...... set everything I’ve set aside.... and think about why you stand for the playing of the national anthem.  Why do you stand with your heart over your chest, with all caps removed?   Indulge my brief history.... Americans have stood for the United States Flag since June 14, 1777, the day the Continental Congress declared, "That the flag of the (thirteen) United States be thirteen stripes, alternate red and white, that the union be thirteen stars, white in a blue field representing a new constellation."  (Flag day is June 14th just in case you wanted to mark your calendars.) 

Thirty-seven years later in August 1814, the White House and the U.S. Capitol lay ashes after the British military burned the public buildings in Washington D.C.  In the immediate aftermath, many Americans understandably feared that the Union Jack, the British flag, would soon fly over all of American again.  Three weeks after the sacking of America, Francis Scott Key, a Maryland attorney who at the time opposed the President in office, was so moved at seeing the U.S. flag flying victoriously at the end of the battle for Baltimore’s Fort McHenry, that he wrote lyrics for the Star Spangled Banner, the song, we call our National Anthem.  

I found an article which I am going to quote that was written by Jane Hampton Cook.  As I read it... the words had meaning.  They had feeling.  

1.). We stand for the flag today, not to please ourselves, but to HONOR those who paid the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom.  

More than 1.2 million Americans who have died because of war.  We stand for soldiers who initially inspired our national anthem, such as William Williams, a runaway slave who later died after having his leg blown off as part of the 38th U.S. Infantry at the Battle of Fort McHenry.   We stand for all of the heroes who made the ultimate sacrifice, dying for their country.  These brave men and women fought the battles and they came home in a box draped in the United States Flag.  

2.). We stand for the flag NOT to focus on what divides us... but what unites us, which is being an American.   

The name American, is something that every United States citizen has the honor and privaledge of holding as their own.   Regardless of our differences, when the National Anthem is played,  in that 3 minutes, we are all united by one bond.  We are Americans.  Stand UP and be proud of that bond.  Being an American deserves our highest respect and pride.   No matter what race, religion, political stance, team affiliation.... for those 3 minutes, we are all exactly the same - American.  

3.). We stand for the flag not to pledge allegiance to a president, but to honor the reality that we have an elected president.  

By standing, we honor the fact that our country has had 45 presidents.  Our flag represents our system of government, divided by 50 states, the stars on the flag, but united under one federal government.  Just because you do not like the president as a person, as an American, we should respect the office.  In four years, we will have a 46th president, who you may or may not like.  

4.). We stand not because of past or present pain caused by injustice, but to salute the principle of justice.  

The color white in the flag represents purity and innocence.  Red signifies hardiness and valor and blue, stands for vigilance, perseverance and justice.  Patriotism is not pride in the pain of our nation’s past.   It is pride in the principles that paved the way for change, Wester that change was trading royalty for representation in 1776 or exchanging enslavement for emancipation in 1863.  Many Americans have stood for justice for a more perfect union.   

5.). We stand for the flag not for our generation but to set an example for the next generation.  

If we do not advocate a love of country to our children and the generations to follow, then why would our own children grow up to respect it and the values and ideals that America stands for today.  Passing along patriotism is crucial to the future survival of America.  When we stand for the flag, we are standing for the hopes of our children’s future, that they will embrace the principles of patriotism and live out it’s moral truths of justice, perseverance and courage.   

Today, we live in a country where our children are being asked to wear backpacks that can also be vest to protect them from a gunman.   We live in a society where we cannot share our differences without being offended.  We live in a society where if our president that we wanted didn’t win, then he isn’t our president.   We live in a society where one person’s sins are greater than another’s.  We live in a society where children are being taught that law enforcement are being mocked as pigs by a professional athlete who chose to wear socks bearing the likeness, and this is the same professional athlete who chose to kneel during the National Anthem.  

The irony.... this professional athlete recently did an ad campaign for a major sports apparel company, Nike, one who has a storied history of third world labor, including child labor and women overseas paying them pennies per hour, only to have a multi-million dollar contract with this professional athlete to use the words.... "Believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything."    I guess Nike didn’t want to mention, that in the late 1980’s, reports began to pile up about kids, overwhelmingly African-American being mugged and murdered by other black kids for their Nike Air Jordans.  Do you think they believe in selective silence? 

The irony.... is that what has this professional athlete sacrificed?  He wanted to raise awareness of the social injustice of African Americans and minorities by law enforcemnet yet, what has he done in the off season of playing football.   Did he work with agencies or law enforcement to create a foundation to better the education of communities on how we can all work seamlessly together?   He stated he felt oppressed but yet, he’s not so oppressed that he isn’t taking a million dollar paycheck?   America... the land of opportunity.   Did he register to vote?   Registering to vote doesn’t take much time or effort.... yet, has he done it?  We’ve had so many individuals who stood for justice and made changes that helped our country become better but they chose to do it in a way that was impactful, not disrespectful to the military.   I read an article by Nate Boyer, who was in the military and in his article he stated that the athlete was not protesting the anthem but demonstrating during the anthem.   Boyer goes on to say that he does not endorse the method but that he supports the players right to do so.  He also states that to him the American flag is not the symbol of a perfect past, it is but the symbol of a hopeful future.  

After reading his article, I would agree that every American has the right to protest but, as a professional athlete who is a role model, the code of conduct should specifically include when it is appropriate and not appropriate to use the place of work for a protest especially when standing for the flag has more impact for our future because in those 3 seconds, we are united.  

As a military family, I do take offense to the kneeling because I do see it as disrespectful.  I was taught to stand for the flag and to kneel before God and in prayer.  I want my children to understand this and I especially want my grandson to understand it.   I take pride in being an American.  I feel a sense of honor to stand and site the pledge or sing the Anthem, and nothing makes me happier than to hear patriotic songs that symbolize our hopes and dreams of a better tomorrow.   I’ve been through 4 deployments and we are currently on our fifth.  Every day, my family prays that our soldier and those deployed with him, won’t be brought home draped in the flag, yet he will be come home standing to salute it, honor it and defend it.  

I stand for the flag out of respect for those who paid the ultimate sacrifice and gave their lives.  I stand for the flag out of my love for my country and for the pride and feeling of hope that I want to share with my grandson and generations to come.  I stand because in that moment, we have no differences.  If you don’t believe me, just do it and see.   

You’re a grand old flag.

You’re a high flying flag. 

And forever in peace may you wave. 

You’re the emblem of

The land I love.

The home of the free and the brave.  

Ev’ry heart beats true

‘Neath the red, white and blue, 

Where there’s never a boast or brag.  

Should auld acquaintance be forgot.

Keep your eye on the grand old flag.  

A Mascot that Endures

Mascots.  High schools have them.  Colleges have them.  Companies have them. They are a way to market a brand while reaching the audience on a personal level.   I live in a small town.  I was born here and I still live here, 53 years later.   Our small town, Oxford is home of the University of Mississippi, also known as Ole Miss.   

Ole Miss was chartered in 1844 and admitted its first enrollment in 1848.  Ole Miss has a storied history with mascots.  Prior to 1937, the athletic teams were called by various names:  the Red and the Blue, the Oxfords, the Mighty Mississippians, the Southerners, the Crimson and the Blue and the most popular up to that point, the Flood.   In 1936, the Mississippian proposed a contest to produce a new nickname for Ole Miss athletic teams.  There were many entries:  Rebels, Raiders, Confederates, Stonewalls .... and ultimately Rebels was chosen and officially adopted by the University.   

Ole Miss introduced it’s first mascot unofficially in 1937.  Colonel Reb.  Many believe that Colonel Reb was inspired by James "Blind Jim" Ivy.   He was a blind peanut vendor and during a baseball game between Ole Miss and the University of Texas, a student told him that Ole Miss was losing badly.   Ivy began cheering loudly for Ole Miss with his loud, booming voice.  The team was inspired by Ivy’s enthusiastic cheering and won the game.   From that point, he was a campus fixture for the next 60 years and was regarded as one of it’s most passionate fans and was known to proudly tell others that he had "never seen Ole Miss lose".  There is no concrete evidence to support this theory but the stories told lend itself to believe that Colonel Reb has the spirit of Blind Jim.   Colonel Reb made his first appearance around 1937 in the newspaper and the Ole Miss yearbook.   It was an image of a southern gentleman, who in many ways resembled Colonel Sanders without glasses and a red suit jacket.  Colonel Rebs mustache was much more of a handlebar and he walked with a cane.   The image of Colonel Reb has been modified several times over the course of his tenure.  He became the official on-field mascot in 1979 and remained on the sidelines until 2003.  

Colonel Reb was a mascot.  Colonel Rebel was also a prestigious honor on campus.   In 1940, Ole Miss students began voting for Colonel Rebel.  The highest honorary position for male students on campus.  The title had previously been called "The King of Mardi Gras" but the name was changed by the Associated Student Body executive council in the fall of 1939.  The distinction was also made in addition to the female equivalent as Miss Ole Miss.   

During the years of Colonel Rebel, known in the early days as Johnny Reb, fans enjoyed seeing this southern gentleman on the field and stands cheering on the teams, shaking hands with adults and kids alike, sharing his good will.  The role was filled by a male cheerleader and the Ole Miss cheerleading team gained recognition as one of the top squads in the nation.  Colonel Reb was named Best Mascot in the SEC in his first year and he also helped lead the Rebels to thirst and first place distinctions by the National Cheerleading Association and the Universal Cheerleading Association respectively.   He was named SEC Mascot of the Year again in 1986 and was named runner up for National Mascot of the Year finishing only behind the mascot of the South Carolina Gamecocks).  Colonel Reb was also on hand to welcome former President Gerald Ford when he visited Ole Miss in 1981.   He was loved and adored by Rebel fans.  During this time, Rebel flags were flown and waved to the sound of the band playing Dixie at the start of every game.  It was as southern as you could be during a football game.   Ole Miss was rich in southern history and every fan attending the game, waved their flags, sang Dixie and smiled at the antics of Colonel Reb climbing to the top of pyramids, performing stunts and playing along with the other teams’ mascot.  

But with all good things.... change happens.  In 2003, the administration was concerned that the character of Colonel Reb perceived a connection to the Old South.   (Okay folks... Ole Miss is located in Mississippi.  It was formed in 1848.   Colonel Reb was introduced in 1937.   Yes, the Old South was part of our history.  Without the history, there would be no school).   They made a decision to remove Colonel Reb from the sideline at athletic events as the official on-field mascot.   The majority of alumni and fans were upset.   Another contest was held to design a replacement for the colonel.  There were 2 finalists:  Rebel Bruiser and Rowdy Rebel.  Fans were encouraged to vote for their favorite.  There was limited fan response and there was ridicule from rival schools which prompted the administration to cancel the poll.   Colonel Reb was loved not just by Rebel fans, but other schools.  

From 2003 - 2010, Ole Miss had no on-field mascot.  Colonel Reb would show up during tailgating and other unofficial events and you would see him on t-shirts, or other apparel and his spirit lived on through every fan in the Grove.  

In 2010, the University announced it would establish a student committee to choose a new mascot for the schools teams.  After months of analyzing responses and feedback, the committee ultimately selected the Black Bear as the new on-field mascot and named the bear Rebel.  Again, there was outcry from the fans, other schools and Colonel Reb still remained very much at the heart of Rebel Nation.   The Colonel Reb Foundation was founded in support of reinstating the Colonel as the university’s mascot.  This group also sponsors Colonel Reb’s unofficial appearances in the Grove.  The University of Mississippi reclassified the Colonel Reb trademark as historical and still owns it.   The bear was confusing for many as nobody quite understood why it was chosen with no apparent to the university other than there could have been some black bears in Mississippi at some point.  It was frustrating and during this time, the love for Colonel Reb only endured.  

Fast forward...... 2017.    The university announced yet again that the mascot would be changing.   This time... to the Landshark.   The Landshark is a term that was inspired by Ole Miss football player Tony Fein, who wore the jersey #47.   Tony played defense for the Rebels and after an aggressive play on the field resulting in a tackle, Fein threw up a "FINS UP" on his forehead .... almost as a taunt to let the other team know the sharks were swarming.   The gesture became widely known and loved and was adopted not only by the football team but also through-out other sports.  "Fins Up" has become part of Ole Miss and fans know that it’s as much a part of our university these days as Hotty Toddy.   With that gesture and fans near and far throwing up "fins up", the Landshark seemed to be a natural choice, or was it.   Today, the mascot was unveiled at the Meet the Rebels Day wearing the #47 jersey and appropriately named Tony in honor of Fein.  The mascot itself, was a creation of a lizard, shark, alien and something in between.  If you read the information released from the University, they feel they met the expectations with the launch and seem very proud of the unveiling.  If you read the blogs and the posts after pictures were posted, once again, it appears Ole Miss will be ridiculed for their mascot.  

Personally, for me.... I love Ole Miss.  I bleed red and blue.  I love Colonel Reb and he will always be my mascot.  I grew up knowing right from wrong.  I grew up knowing that history shaped our state, our country and our own family.   I grew up being proud to be from Mississippi.  I don’t know how I feel about the Landshark just yet.   At first glance,  I thought, at least he has a tie to Ole Miss, to the school and the kids seem to really like him.   After further thought, I realized that no other mascot will ever replace Colonel Reb.  He’s a part of all of us.  He exemplified all that was good about the south.  A kind, southern gentleman who greeted everyone with a handshake, pat on the back and had a swagger to him that made his personality magnify.   As I thought about this, I realized that one of the issues we have in today’s society is the fact that we get easily offended over everything.  My thoughts are we cannot change the past nor history.  It is part of every single one of us.   We can remove the Rebel flag, we can remove Dixie, we can remove Colonel Reb but they all still live within all of our hearts whether you admit it to yourself or not.  

Hotty Toddy, Ya’ll.   Good Luck to Tony.  I’ll be watching as he throws his first Fins Up in the Vault!  

Faith, Family and Finding Your Way

I've been wanting to write this post for quite some time, but the words were somewhat of a jumbled mess.  For those who know me... know that for 45 years, I was lucky and blessed to talk or see my parents everyday.   Most people probably won't understand how powerful that statement is...but for me... it's one that I think about often with my own children.  I want that same kind of relationship.  I want to be part of their lives, sharing their joys, failures, triumphs and experiencing life.  No... that doesn't mean that I want to run their lives, because they are adults afterall but family is the bond that is always there and this past year.... I realize that more than ever.  This post is not about my kids or my parents.  It's about the lesson that my brother taught me this past year.  Every time I've attempted to write this, my emotions get the best of me.  I get overwhelmed and stop.  Last night, I was dropping off some things at my brother's house for his grandbaby (my great niece) and as we sat there talking... I knew that it was time to write down the feelings.  This will be a long post... so bear with me, but I feel like it's time to tell my brother's story (from my perspective.).  

One year ago, my brother had what we all thought was a major sinus infection.  He's had these before and like most men (and even women) hates going to the doctor.  Typically, with a sinus infection, a steroid shot will knock it out and put him back on his feet.  This time... something was different.  He was in great pain, to the point where he could not even hold his head up.  My sister-in-law took him to the local hospital where they placed him in the trauma ER and discovered that his blood sugar had skyrocketed... above 600.  Now... I am not sure how much you know about blood sugar, but this is a dangerous number for so many reasons.  ( Before we go any further... let me say this...my brother is one of the healthiest people I know.  He would walk 6-7 miles a day, eat all the right things, and really watched his diet. Out of all of my parents children, he is definitely not the one that I would have thought to have high blood sugar. ).   They admitted him to the hospital and placed him immediately into ICU.  For 24 hours.... they were trying to figure out what was wrong... and running tests and things seem to be getting worse.  As I sat in the ICU waiting room with my brothers family, I realized one thing... no matter what goes on in life... family... is the bond that is forever there.  You can fight, be mad at each other, not see each other every day or see each other every day... but when the tough gets going... it's family that you lean on.  My brother was transferred to Memphis after he began to lose sight in one eye.  He was again placed in ICU.   They transferred him in the middle of the night... and one of the scariest things is walking into an ICU waiting room at 3 in the morning.  To be honest... it's a bit overwhelming.  The Clampetts (that is what I call my family) walked in with our pillows and found us a corner and tried to get 30 minutes of sleep here and there.... only to be wakened by sobs and cries of the family next door and their loved one going into code blue... and then an hour later, stabilized and they celebrated with fried chicken.  Yes... this truly happened.  

Over the next two weeks, the ICU waiting room became our home.  My brothers family and mine.  We took turns going out to get food, take naps and wait for word on his progress.  During this time, the doctors were continuing to find out what was wrong... and how to treat it.  By this time, my brother had lost all sight in his right eye.  He had a doctor for everything.  Finally, they discovered that my brother had a fungus that had invaded his body's immune system and taken over.  WHAT?  Yes... that's exactly what we said... but the way it was explained to us is that we breathe in fungus every day of our lives... when we have healthy immune systems... our bodies fight off these fungi.... when our immune systems are compromised... and in my brothers case, his blood sugar was over 600.... it gives the fungus a way to come in and take over the body.   During our time in Memphis, my brother had a sinus surgery, was placed on anti fungal medicines and went through so many needle pricks that I lost count.  Through-it all.... his faith never waivered nor did his family.   My brother's wife is a nurse as is his oldest daughter... and honestly.... I pray for those who don't have loved ones in the medical field who are in these situations.  (One thing to note... my niece was around 7 1/2 /8 months pregnant at the time my brother was admitted to the hospital, so to say we were not only worried about him... but her as well. )

  Every day that we were in Memphis... it was one thing after another... there wasn't much positive news.  They called in neurosurgeons who discovered that the fungus had invaded my brother's skull base, his internal carotid as well as spinal cord.  It was basically everywhere.  Over the course of 2 weeks, every day ... the doctors and their residents would come in and take my brother through all of the steps and there was never one thing positive.  It was a very depressing situation.  There was nothing positive.  It was almost as if they were trained to be the bearer of bad news.  They said that there was nothing that could be done... and that there was not a neurosurgeon at Somme's Murphy that would operate because the type of fungus that my brother had and where it was.... was just not an option.  If you ever want to do some reading... just look up Mucor Fungus.  It will scare you to death.  

At this point.... we were all emotionally drained.  My brother was exhausted but he was determined.  He point blank told the family, I'm not giving up.  I'm going to do everything they tell me so ya'll don't give up either.   Deep down... I know he had to be scared.  I know he had to be thinking why me?  I know he had to have private cries that I never saw.  We began researching neurosurgeons to find the best one in the country.  At this point, we would have flown to China or wherever.   God works in strange ways and always leads you where you need to be and in this case.... God led us to Little Rock, Arkansas.   There was a neurosurgeon there was was ranked in the top 1% in the world but he had to accept my brother's case.  He did.   I'll never forget the conversation between my sister in law and myself that day.... "are you going to go with us?"  "Yes".  And that was it.  There was never a question.  There was never an expectation.  It was about a family taking care of family.   My task wasn't to take care of my brother.  My task was to help take care of my brother's family, however I could.  

We transferred to Little Rock and again he was placed in ICU.  This time..... it was different.  The hospital was a Catholic hospital and the man we had come to see, was extremely well known for "going places nobody else has gone".   They got my brother situated and immediately began running their tests, the 2nd day we were there.  They had taken him down to do the scans.   At this point, we were introduced to Dr. K's partner, who quietly walked into the waiting room and told us that the fungus had invaded his internal carotid and that it had to be taken down.  I'll never forget the conversation.  My sister in law said.... "okay, when will they schedule this".  The doctor... looked her straight in the eye... and said, "well, we have him on the table now... so we'll do it right now, with your consent.".  There was never a "we can't take it out" or an "we won't".  It was "we will".  From the moment we arrived... it was positive and uplifting and they had no doubt that they would get him well.  

They successfully removed the internal carotid and my brother did great.  He had waves of nausea, he couldn't eat and he was in pain... but he was determined.  He endured more than I ever could and watching him go through this... I realized... in that moment.  God doesn't give you anything you cannot handle.  He gives you things that challenge you and change you, but nothing... you cannot handle.   Finally, the day came for my brother to go through brain surgery, where Dr. K would go in and remove all of the fungus from his skull base and anywhere he could get to.   As we sat in the waiting room, with all of the other families who had loved ones waiting to go into surgeries.... I looked at my brother's family.  I looked at mine.  I prayed harder that day than I've ever prayed before...(or so I think).  How could he endure brain surgery?  How long would it take?  What would happen to him afterwards?  Would he be different?  Thousands of questions were in my mind, on my heart.... but they remained silent.  I just sat in the waiting room with my family... and together we clung to every minute on the clock, watching and waiting... until we received our first update that they had started.  We knew it was going to be a long day... and we all knew the risks.   Hours went by and we got another update and another.  All was going well.  When the final update came....that the doctor would be out to talk to us,  it was hard to believe we had been sitting in the waiting room for almost 10 hours, maybe 12.  I don't even remember, but it was an all day ordeal.  When the doctor came out... he was smiling.  Grinning actually.  He looked straight at my sister in law and said, "we got it".  Tears rolled down my face as I heard the words.  They got the enemy.  They took it down.  They removed it.  Everything was going to be okay.  Wasn't it?  

Over the next week... my brother recovered from brain surgery.  He was nauseated, he still couldn't eat and he was weak.  His blood sugar was still fluctuating and his creatin levels were not where they wanted them to be but... he was determined to go home.  He got up and walked when they said.  He ate and threw up.  Ate and threw up.  We brought in every kind of food we could think of hoping that something would taste good and he could keep it down.   So what was making him so sick... well, the anti-fungal medicines are the strongest there are and they take a toll on your body.  They told us from the beginning that this would be a challenge... and that he would have to be on them for a very long time even after they removed the fungus... because they would prevent it from coming back.  It's amazing all the things you notice in a hospital after being there so long.  You begin to know other patients by name, laugh at the stupidest things and basically become a robot to what your day will be like.  We had been in Little Rock for 2 1/2 weeks and it was now mid October and they had successfully done the surgery and the goal was to get my brother home.  I had a conference coming up the 3rd week of October and knew I would have to leave for a week.  I was so torn.  By this time, my niece who was due end of October/first of November had also gone home to get ready for the baby.   My sister in law was a mountain of strength, but like all of us... she had moments where she was exhausted and after not being in your own bed for more than a month... all you want is to go home, be in your bed... and to see your 1st grandchild born.  Yes... that was on everyone's mind.  Would they be home in time?  

I texted, called and checked on him every day I was not there.  Finally, the text I had been waiting on came... they are going to let him go home.  I'll never forget.  October 28th.  He had lived in 3 different hospitals since September 12th.  They had counted him out more times than not... and God led us to the man who would save him.  Tears of joy.  Streaming down my face.  He was getting to go home.  They released him late in the day.  There would be a lot that had to be done at home, but the fact that he was getting to come home... was huge.  My sister in law packed him up... and they drove the 3 1/2 hours home.  He was sick as a dog from the ride... but he was home.  They got him settled... and for the next few days, it was rough. It was an adjustment.  On October 31st, my niece welcomed our sweet princess into the world.  My sister in law was there as was I and we facetimed seeing the baby for the first time with my brother at home, so he could see his grandchild.  We were overwhelmed.  

The story doesn't end there... no... over the course of the next year, my brother would have good days, bad days and through it all, he endured.  He has had follow up visits with Dr. K, who calls my brother his walking miracle.  He is still on the anti-fungals, but he's getting better every day.  He went to hell and back.... and he survived.  

 Last night, as we were talking... we were debating something... and he said "you'll never be as smart as me" and I laughed and said... even with half a brain.  No, they didn't take out his brain, or part of it... they only removed the fungus, but the fact that a year later we can joke about it is a miracle.  I thought to myself... You're right... I won't be as smart, nor as strong.  I know there are many families who have gone through stories like ours where you have faith and family to get you through life's toughest moments.  For my family... it was a wake-up call... that life is fragile and precious.  My brother is alive and finding his way... his new normal... because every day is a gift.  

To Give or Not To Give...

To Give or Not to Give.... 

With the recent aftermath of hurricanes Harvey and Irma, there are so many people in need.  Many have homes that are flooded or much worse, leveled.  There are those in need of water, power, food... the basic necessities.   When Hurricane Harvey hit Houston, the aftermath was boggling.  I had friends who were evacuated and were not allowed back into their homes.  When they finally returned... there was nothing left but a soggy mess.  

Yes, material things can be replaced and we should all be grateful that it's life that we cherish, but it doesn't make it that less frustrating knowing you have to start over.  As I was trying to determine how best to to help these friends... I realized that somebody without a home to go back to may not need clothes that you would send.  So... I thought, what about gift cards, so they can purchase just the basic necessities.   (Food, personal items, etc.)  There were friends who I sent the cards directly to, but I wondered about all the other families.  The ones that I didn't know, but wanted to help.    

During this time, Irma had begun to pick up steam and was headed for the US Virgin Islands, the Keys and Florida.   I have so many friends who live in these areas.  I do work in this state.  I became glued to the television with the track of when, where and how bad was it going to be.  As Irma strengthen into a Category 5,  again, I was bothered by the fact that people who had lost everything might not get to see any dollars that I had contributed to the American Red Cross or a few other organizations that I made monetary donations to, so I did a little research and was really bothered by some of the things I found.   The purpose of this blog is just to do a little homework before freely giving a monetary donation.   I know we have seen celebrities do the telethons, create go fund accounts, set up foundations... but how do we know how much of the money really goes to help the victims of these horrific disasters.  The 

I know that charities have to have personnel to run them.  I believe that everyone should be paid for their time to do these jobs, but at the same time, I want to make sure that my donations are going to help people.  One charity that I will no longer donate to is Goodwill.   I used to take items that I no longer needed here, because it was fast and convenient for me... and thinking that I was also helping others.  Wrong.  I was helping their CEO's bank account.   After finding out this information, I decided to make sure that in the future... any charity that I work with or donate too, will get a thorough back-ground check to ensure that they are indeed reputable and helping those in need. 

As Irma made her way through the islands, the Keys and finally Florida and the southeast.  She left a lot of devastation, just as Harvey had done the week before.   Many are without the basic needs.  If you have family or friends in these areas and you can communicate with them... I would strongly suggest gift cards to places like Target, Wal Mart, food places, gas cards, etc.  These are things that can help with just the basic supplies.  Then... if you really want to make a monetary donation, I know that the American Red Cross has a CEO and employees but I do believe that they are helping victims along with the Salvation Army.  There are a number of military charities that are helping veterans as well.   Pets are another issue.  Many of the shelters in these areas have had to take in pets that were left behind and are in need of supplies.  Local food banks are collecting non-perishable items to give out so these are always a good idea if you can get supplies to them.   Many cities, towns across the country have been gathering supplies as a community to send in to the affected areas. The main thing is to make sure that the charity is a highly rated and established one that offers how much of the money collected actually goes to the victims.  

So... as you determine whether to give or not to give... my advice would be... yes, help.  Do what you can but just make sure you know where your dollars are going.  One of the best things to come out of these horrific disasters is to see people helping people.  We are human and by nature, we all want to help our neighbors.  It's those few... that truly create a bad name for us all and unfortunately, that includes charities as well.  

We will continue to keep all of the affected areas in our thoughts and prayers and remember, every little bit does make a difference.