Self-Reflection... Out with the Old... IN with the New!

Out with the old... and in with the new.... what a familiar saying, right?    It's hard to believe 12 months have passed and we are ready to close out another year.   2011... has pretty much come and gone.     For me, it's been a long year and one filled with many changes.  It's been a year of frustrations, challenges, difficult times... but also one of success and triumph.   I've grown in many ways this past year and found out things about myself that surprised me.  Isn't it amazing that you are never too old to learn something new about yourself.  (And... trust me, I do not like to be reminded how old I am...but, as a very dear friend tells me ... often... AGE is just a number.)  

At the end of every year... I do... what I like to call my "self- reflection" of the past year.  Things that I accomplished... things I didn't.  Things I'd do over... things that I hope to never do again.   Things that made me smile, laugh and really love my life.   Things that were difficult, depressing and provide moments of temporary insanity.   Things I want to change... and things I want to keep.  Self-reflection can be a humbling and numbing exercise, not to mention,  a painful one, but... I've learned that in order to grow as an individual, sometimes, we need these self-induced "wake-up" calls.    

My wake up call involves a number of items on the "2012 List" both in a good way and those that need some "tweaking" as I will put it.   The good things this past year have allowed me to appreciate small successes both professionally and personally, one by one...each not being easy to accomplish, but just knowing that I did and that I could was success in itself.   What is success without relationships?  NOTHING.   I am very fortunate that I have a wide circle of friends and family who are always rooting for me and are there to share the successes and the failures.  They are the constant in my life..... and I am definitely appreciative of every single relationship and sometimes it takes a very close call of losing a relationship that means everything to you to make you realize how fragile and precious they are to your well being and your happiness.  

Another good thing on my 2011 list has been... this blog.   I have been so touched by the messages I have received after posts.  Your comments that you've made...have really helped me to know that my words have touched different people in different ways.   For me... the writing is therapeutic.  It has provided me with an outlet to express my thoughts.   At the same time, it's also allowed me a broader opportunity to evaluate life experiences in a new way and to share them.  I hope that ya'll will continue reading and sharing back with me.   There's plenty more good on my list from 2011 but there's also some areas of change that I need to address.   We all have those... 

For my "tweaking" items...   One thing I have realized this past year is that I have allowed circumstances beyond my control to "control" my life so to speak and... as of this moment... it stops.   The only thing that I can control is me and my reaction to events surrounding me or affecting me.   I've looked back and realized that my reaction to certain circumstances put me in a bad place at various times during the past year.   It allowed me to become someone that I don't like or really want to be.   So, first on my list....with a double and triple underline... Be ME... and control my reaction and try to breathe before "re-acting."  That's a tall order... but, the first step... being aware of it.   I've said this one many times through-out the year... and I often slip... but, I am determined to be diligent in the coming year.   

Number 2 on my list... REMAIN positive regardless of the situation.   From past experience, I know that negativity can swallow you up ... and drown you ... IF you allow it.   (so, see... #1 and #2 are working together ... here!)  If you're negative, then EVERYTHING is negative.   It's hard to stay positive... all the time.  It's hard to always see the glass half full INSTEAD of half empty... but.... again, the whole purpose of the self-reflection exercise is to remind yourself of all of the things that you want to change... and those you don't.   So... for 2012, I am going to post a positive thoughts and comments as often as I can.   

#3 on my list... is to get healthy again.   At 47... it JUST ain't as easy as it used to be!    I've had health problems for as long as I can remember... from stomach, to back... to migraines... to everything in between.  My list of woes is enough to make your head spin... and as my grown children often tease me... there's not much left for them to take out or to find wrong with me... IS THERE?   The way I see it... it could BE much worse than it is...  so, I definitely feel like I'm pretty LUCKY.   

My back doctor tells me I have the back of an 85 year old... (WOW... that's motivation, isn't it?).   My stomach doctor tells me that i have to find a way to alleviate STRESS from my life..... because apparently, when I am stressed... so is my stomach! (I could be the poster person for TUMS, PEPCID, PREVACID, NEXIUM,  well... you get the picture, right?)    (Well... if anybody can tell me a cure for stress... I am all ears!)  I've realized that being healthy is really about having a balance in all things.  It's not just about diet and exercise.   So... I have a new plan for 2012.... that hopefully will put my mind, body and soul back in balance for a healthier, less stressful and happier me again.   OH, I SO WANT TO BE ME AGAIN.   (You're probably asking yourself... well, who has she been?)  

#4 on my list... is in regards to my professional life.  This past year, I managed to develop and execute a brand new concept...that I truly believe in and for that I am quite grateful for the many friends and colleagues who stood with me and behind me to get it off the ground.   I plan on coming back in 2012 with a few changes to make it even better.   Success is sweeter when shared and it's often a result of those around you.   In my situation, that is definitely the reason.   So, #4 .. is to continue to TRY, not give up and work hard to find opportunities to grow professionally.   The phrase... UNDERpromise and OVERdeliver... definitely means something.  I want to be looked upon as someone who doesn't give up... who has a passion and believes .... I want to be the person that has the positive outlook and attitude to accomplish anything.   Will there be failures?  Of course.. but, with every success... failure helps you get there.   

My list continues on with a number of odds and in's... but for the most part, I know that I am truly blessed in this life and know not to take a moment of it for granted.  So #5 on my list... is to SIMPLY LIVE.   It's a motto on my blog page... Simply Livin' and it seems that I needed reminding of it myself. Life itself can sometimes get us down... and it takes a simple gesture to get us back on track.   We should take time every day to breathe and appreciate every moment.  We should love like there is no tomorrow and we should forgive easier.   I guess Tim McGraw's song... Live Like You Were Dying... really holds true and maybe we should all take a moment of self reflection of it. 

2011 has been ... what a good friend once told me... "character building".   I've gone through some tough times on both a personal and professional level... but, at the end of the day.... I'm still here.  I survived and I have the opportunity to make 2012 a better year.   So... as the last week of 2011 begins... and my self reflection episode continues ... I look back with thankfulness for every person who was in my life this past year.   

I look forward to 2012 with a renewed spirit and hope to make a difference, change lives and to be the person that I know that I can be.   I have a new commitment to being me, being positive and to never giving up on the things that I believe in, want and know that are worth it.   I have re-found my passion to simply live for the moment to appreciate all of the things that we often take for granted.  Life... is what we make it... NOT what it makes us.  

My wish for each of you.... is to take time to enjoy the simple pleasures in life, to make time for friends, to laugh and enjoy a cup of coffee and a wonderful conversation, to achieve your successes with a smile and take your failures as an opportunity.   If you are ever in doubt of yourself... stop and hold a 5 minute conversation with a child... it will OPEN your heart and your eyes.   Children see things in such a simple way -- no wonder they are happier than adults!     May 2012 shine brightly upon you with love, prosperity, good health and most of all... happiness.   

Happy New Year!  

Same old dog... a bunch of new tricks!

About a year ago, I posted this blog in another situation.  As I found myself reflecting on new opportunities, I found myself led back to it... and taking time to revise it and re-write it, I found that it still fits everything I am feeling today.    I recently watched the movie, The Company Men starring Ben Affleck, Kevin Costner, Tommy Lee Jones and others.   It hit home in many ways.  It allowed me to take a good hard look at myself and where I want to be... and to reach deep inside to discover what I truly wanted in regards to my career as well as what's really important in life.   It's funny, how at the oddest times, we relate to a movie, a song or book... that moves us to the point of finally taking chances on ourselves.   

How many times have you heard the phrase, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”?   When starting on any new journey, whether personal or professional... you always have some apprehension.  Butterflies that seem to appear when you least expect them... although at times, they can be caused from excitement and anticipation.   In my own personal situation, leaving a job 3 years ago that I loved and launching myself into a whole new arena was frightening and yet, I knew at the time, it was definitely the right direction I needed to take.   Sitting here, 3 years later, I absolutely know that it was the right decision.    I knew going into a new situation that there would be areas of expertise that I did not have nor felt I would ever have, but, I also felt that I could gain enough knowledge to learn enough to get by or surround myself with enough people who did have the expertise.   We don't always make the right decisions and when we realize that we have made a bad one, we have to be strong enough to admit it and get back on the right path.   

It can be quite scary embarking on a new adventure.    Where to begin?   How do you find your niche that allows you to become a viable entity in a new market or to continue to be relevant in an industry that you still wanted to be part of - just in a new way.   For me,    as I began the process of launching my consulting company… this old proverb came to mind endless times and … there were days, when I would ask myself could this really be true?  Am I too old to learn something new?   Will I be able to have any success going forward?  The questions were endless.     I thought that I had found the answers a year or so ago... only to discover, that I was wrong.   I was angry with myself for allowing myself to believe in something that did not come to fruition in the way that I had expected or believed.   I realize now, that without risks, we don't learn.  Without learning, we remain the same.   In hindsight, everything happens for a reason and even though the answers I thought I had were wrong, I've learned some valuable insights along the way.   I am still seeking the answers, but feel I am on the right path to gaining them.   

I have found that the answer is simple to the old proverb...…no, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but you can teach him alternative ways of doing the ones he already knows.   My journey has allowed me to take the things that I already knew and find a way of adapting and making them work in a new situation.  Sales are sales… no matter what you are selling and my philosophy has always been sell yourself, sell your company and then finally, sell your product.  Marketing is marketing… keep the messaging simple, on target  with your audience and don’t be afraid to try something new.   Relationships are still the most viable way to get things done in any situation, so hold them close and know that they are your most valuable asset.  Being old, doesn't mean being worn out.   I've often heard many who changed careers mid-stream, mid-life say that the first year afterwards was the scariest of their lives.   I absolutely understand that feeling.   I found that what helped me the most was surrounding myself with the right people has made all the difference in the world.   People who know the business or situation you're trying to get into and learning from them and understanding how to take your own area of expertise and apply their knowledge to it can help propel you into a brand new arena with success.     So, with these things that I did know… I’ve taken a step back… and just re-adjusted the them to fit my new arena.   Wherever my path takes me, I know that regardless of how I get there, I'm not too old to try.   I'm not too old to learn and I am certainly not too old to have the enthusiasm and energy needed to create and find success.   

After breaking it down… the journey did not seem nearly as scary and I found that… maybe the old proverb was just a way of providing an excuse for those who don’t want to try.   And for those of you, who like me contemplate change and reaching for your own happiness  - my word of advice is that without taking risk you won't ever know what could be... without dreaming and reaching for the stars, you'll never achieve the one thing that could completely fulfill your life.   At times, I've been afraid and taken the safe route.   I realize now, I was letting myself down by not going for what I truly wanted.   Every day, I become more familiar with my dreams and goals.   I work diligently to stay true to myself and to understand what it is I truly seek.   When, I'm feeling like my time has come and gone,  I take it one step at a time.  I reflect on all the great successes I've had and look forward to those I've yet to meet.   Challenges will come and go, but it's the hunt in finding the perfect one for me that keeps me motivated.  

So next time someone tells me… you can’t teach an old dog new tricks… I think I’ll smile and say… SURE, you can!