Same old dog... a bunch of new tricks!

About a year ago, I posted this blog in another situation.  As I found myself reflecting on new opportunities, I found myself led back to it... and taking time to revise it and re-write it, I found that it still fits everything I am feeling today.    I recently watched the movie, The Company Men starring Ben Affleck, Kevin Costner, Tommy Lee Jones and others.   It hit home in many ways.  It allowed me to take a good hard look at myself and where I want to be... and to reach deep inside to discover what I truly wanted in regards to my career as well as what's really important in life.   It's funny, how at the oddest times, we relate to a movie, a song or book... that moves us to the point of finally taking chances on ourselves.   

How many times have you heard the phrase, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”?   When starting on any new journey, whether personal or professional... you always have some apprehension.  Butterflies that seem to appear when you least expect them... although at times, they can be caused from excitement and anticipation.   In my own personal situation, leaving a job 3 years ago that I loved and launching myself into a whole new arena was frightening and yet, I knew at the time, it was definitely the right direction I needed to take.   Sitting here, 3 years later, I absolutely know that it was the right decision.    I knew going into a new situation that there would be areas of expertise that I did not have nor felt I would ever have, but, I also felt that I could gain enough knowledge to learn enough to get by or surround myself with enough people who did have the expertise.   We don't always make the right decisions and when we realize that we have made a bad one, we have to be strong enough to admit it and get back on the right path.   

It can be quite scary embarking on a new adventure.    Where to begin?   How do you find your niche that allows you to become a viable entity in a new market or to continue to be relevant in an industry that you still wanted to be part of - just in a new way.   For me,    as I began the process of launching my consulting company… this old proverb came to mind endless times and … there were days, when I would ask myself could this really be true?  Am I too old to learn something new?   Will I be able to have any success going forward?  The questions were endless.     I thought that I had found the answers a year or so ago... only to discover, that I was wrong.   I was angry with myself for allowing myself to believe in something that did not come to fruition in the way that I had expected or believed.   I realize now, that without risks, we don't learn.  Without learning, we remain the same.   In hindsight, everything happens for a reason and even though the answers I thought I had were wrong, I've learned some valuable insights along the way.   I am still seeking the answers, but feel I am on the right path to gaining them.   

I have found that the answer is simple to the old proverb...…no, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but you can teach him alternative ways of doing the ones he already knows.   My journey has allowed me to take the things that I already knew and find a way of adapting and making them work in a new situation.  Sales are sales… no matter what you are selling and my philosophy has always been sell yourself, sell your company and then finally, sell your product.  Marketing is marketing… keep the messaging simple, on target  with your audience and don’t be afraid to try something new.   Relationships are still the most viable way to get things done in any situation, so hold them close and know that they are your most valuable asset.  Being old, doesn't mean being worn out.   I've often heard many who changed careers mid-stream, mid-life say that the first year afterwards was the scariest of their lives.   I absolutely understand that feeling.   I found that what helped me the most was surrounding myself with the right people has made all the difference in the world.   People who know the business or situation you're trying to get into and learning from them and understanding how to take your own area of expertise and apply their knowledge to it can help propel you into a brand new arena with success.     So, with these things that I did know… I’ve taken a step back… and just re-adjusted the them to fit my new arena.   Wherever my path takes me, I know that regardless of how I get there, I'm not too old to try.   I'm not too old to learn and I am certainly not too old to have the enthusiasm and energy needed to create and find success.   

After breaking it down… the journey did not seem nearly as scary and I found that… maybe the old proverb was just a way of providing an excuse for those who don’t want to try.   And for those of you, who like me contemplate change and reaching for your own happiness  - my word of advice is that without taking risk you won't ever know what could be... without dreaming and reaching for the stars, you'll never achieve the one thing that could completely fulfill your life.   At times, I've been afraid and taken the safe route.   I realize now, I was letting myself down by not going for what I truly wanted.   Every day, I become more familiar with my dreams and goals.   I work diligently to stay true to myself and to understand what it is I truly seek.   When, I'm feeling like my time has come and gone,  I take it one step at a time.  I reflect on all the great successes I've had and look forward to those I've yet to meet.   Challenges will come and go, but it's the hunt in finding the perfect one for me that keeps me motivated.  

So next time someone tells me… you can’t teach an old dog new tricks… I think I’ll smile and say… SURE, you can!

Kudos to the Creative Minds of.... what else, DRINKS!

Have you ever walked into a restaurant or bar and felt overwhelmed by the menu choices?   I mean, honestly, some of the drink menus today are pages and pages of incredible sounding recipes that seem to "over stimulate" your mind, body and soul.  Do you feel your palate salivating at the sound of some of the tasty creations?  Have you ever thought about who created those concoctions?   

This past week,  I was one of the many THOUSANDS to attend Tales of the Cocktail, an annual festival that is held in New Orleans every year.  If you haven't heard of it or you haven't been - place it on your calendar!   Every July,  it's a gathering like no other.

Among those attending were not only regular folks like you and me who just love to imbibe, but, the elite de' elite in the hospitality business.  The creators of all of those "tempting drink creations" on menus nationwide - yes, I am referring to the bartenders and mixologists from all across the US.

Whoever thinks that these guys and girls aren't at the top of their game are just WRONG.   I am so impressed every single day by their passion, their intensity, their fun for life, but most of all, their work ethics!  They create, develop, share and most of all, ENJOY every second doing it.  They have elevated the craft of being behind the bar to a completely new level. 

TOTC (shortened version) has become one of the leading festivals in the US, in the hospitality industry, sharing the history of the cocktail, tasting rooms, spirited dinners, networking and friendships, all while being surrounded and embraced by the City of New Orleans.  It simply doesn't get much better.   My hat is completely off to Ann (the founder and aka Mrs. Cocktail) , who has done an amazing job since the very first one.   Next year, they will be celebrating their 10th anniversary and I know that it will be even bigger and better!  Here's the website:   www.talesofthecocktail.com, so please check it out and put it on your radar!   


I'm sure that I am not alone in my dilemma when it comes to ordering cocktails.   I have never been a self professed expert, just someone who enjoys a good one.   I have friends who can look at the menu and immediately determine in their mind which one,  just by the description,   is going to taste fabulous on their palate.   For me, it just isn't that easy, so,when I have an opportunity to converse with the creators, I am  simply in awe.  

In conversations with them, I have really learned so much about ordering and even understanding how to order.  They all agree, that most of the time,  they have a lot of people who come in and don't really know what they want to drink - so it's their job to create something delectable.   What I found is that they do this by simply engaging in conversation and asking a few questions?  Do you like sweet flavors?   Salty?  Are you partial to exotic?    Or sometimes, they say, let me create something for you and if you don't like it, we'll find something else and they work their magic on a drink that they have been given rave reviews for in the past.


I am sure that there are tons of venues across the country with this kind of personal touch and I hope to experience each and every one of them.   I love people and when you run across somebody who shares the same type of passion as you do, it's just a wonderful experience, which is why, this past week, seeing and being around all of these talented and creative individuals had me GIDDY as a school girl.  (We all know how many years ago that was, don't we? )  They are true professionals who believe in their work, share their passion with each and every one of us every single time we go into their establishments and along the way... we've found and made a new friend.  Think about your favorite local hang-out... you go in, they know you by name, know what you like to drink... maybe that Cheers mentality wasn't so bad after all.    

As I've thought about some of my favorite spots and people, I realized that they all had one thing in common - their understanding of the customer experience while also having the ability and talent to create something wonderful.   Its a dynamic combination and every time I see it, I am just as impressed as the time before.  It truly never gets old!   

To all of my friends in this profession and to those I have yet to meet, Cheers to each and every one of you and I really hope to see all of you before next July in New Orleans!

With Heart and Soul...

Every now and then, a project or opportunity comes our way and we feel very passionate about it.  We feel connected to it and give it everything and then some.  We give it ... HEART AND SOUL.    I'm not saying that we don't do every task  or job to the best of our ability.  I think that most of us definitely want success in every way, but I do believe that there are certain projects for whatever reasons, we are compelled to give it 100% plus another 50%.

I think I've written many times, the power of words is tremendous.  The power of two simple ones can make or break someone's attitude and work ethic - thank you.   Many times, when you are given a task... if you are shown no appreciation or gratitude for your efforts, well... you get a little skittish in the "over zealous" department of trying to put forth added effort.  If the people you're working with constantly criticize any efforts that you make... then, you're apt to back-off.  But... then there are those projects when your efforts are praised from start to finish and you give it all you've got.  You give it HEART AND SOUL... and at the end of it, not only are you thrilled, but whoever you are working with is thrilled as well.  

What is the difference in your work?   Is there a difference and is it noticeable?  Absolutely, there is a difference.  You know it and ultimately those you are working with or for, knows it. 


Someone once told me that if you can't believe in what you're doing and grab a hold of it... you'll never be successful at it.   I may not have understood that many years ago, but today, that would be one piece of advice that I would offer to anyone.  Another would be... that  I think you also have to enjoy it.   There is nothing more miserable than doing a job or task that you dread.   (for me... it's like housework...and that is something I definitely dread!)

I also believe that staying positive, especially in an economy and society, when things aren't always looking rosy, we would all be compelled to find our passion and go about all our tasks with heart and soul.   It's not always that easy.. and most of us are just very grateful to even have jobs at the moment, but sometimes... in life, we all have to take a look at the quality and ask ourselves the hard questions - are we truly happy?  

Every day, I TRY to wake up with that attitude and try to implement it in whatever I am doing.  Some days, I accomplish that and then there are those days, when even after all my futile attempts, I know that I just need to get through it as best I can. Trust me, like you, I have been through some very stressful and trying times over the course of my career, and most recently, life has a way of throwing curve balls when you least expect it.   There are days when I really want to pull those covers over my head... and HIDE!  

Through my own stress and difficulties, I have realized that we can't always be everything to everybody, just like we can't always have our "signature passion" on every single project that we do, but for those that we are able to connect to and really feel part of... we should take those and put them up like badges.   They may be few and far between, but there is no greater joy than doing a job you enjoy and love to do... and being successful at it. 

I've often wondered if the founder of facebook, twitter, or even foursquare... if they pursued their projects with heart and soul... and the outcome was multiplied in thousands?  What about Bill Gates?   Warren Buffet?   Steve Jobs?   Did they put their heart and soul into their respective projects to gain their successes?

I guess my own theory is that it only takes one project with all your heart and soul to take hold and steer our lives down a path that we never dreamed.

It takes one idea... one heart... and one soul.  (Now, that's something to ponder over, isn't it? )

Be Gold, Not Tin.

What's more precious: a nugget of gold or a wad of tin?

Be gold. Make yourself rare and desirable through hard work and smart self-branding. Soon people will agree that you're priceless.

 

When I ran across this in an article I was reading, it was vaguely familiar.   It pulled at the heartstrings because it wasn't so long ago (okay...not quite a decade ago)... that I questioned my own value.  I've never thought about it in the workplace until some years ago... somebody said to me, "everyone can be replaced".  "There is nobody who is irreplaceable."  These comments not only made me sick to my stomach, they angered me.  

For me, this was an impossible concept to have someone say this to me.  For those who know me, know that I am passionate about my work.  I felt depleted after these remarks.    After all, the purpose of becoming good at what you do, is so you have value...value that allows you to have security and stability, so that you can't be easily replaced and that your presence means something to a company.   I guess I relate this to a specialist who goes to school and training for years to become an "expert" in their field... if they had no value or were replaceable, then why bother in the first place.  Right? 

I've thought about this conversation many times and each time, I find that it irritates me more and more.   As a manager, employer or leader - it's our responsibility to empower people to find their value and to hone it.  It's also our responsibility to recognize it and reward it.  

Do you know what your value is in your company?   Often, more times than not, I have been one of these people who really worked hard to do a great job and the reward came when I saw the end result.  (at least in my mind... that's what I thought.)   I never really thought about the financial aspect of it... until, this comment was made to me.     We've all learned lessons along life's job highway.   We've all had jobs we loved and probably a few that we didn't.    We've all been given opportunities to showcase our talents so that we could shine and for most of us, we are extremely grateful for those opportunities.  Isn't the old saying that one opportunity leads to another?    In most cases, I am pretty sure that for me, I felt I had to exceed expectations to earn my way.  I felt that going above and beyond would help me to climb the ladder and achieve success.
 
I've learned that there are some who will take advantage of whatever you're willing to give without even acknowledging it.  Actually, they grow to expect it or even demand it.   (For the record, this is NOT behavior that is acceptable).    I learned early in my career to believe in myself, what I could accomplish and to not settle for anything less than what I was worth.    If you don't ask, you won't ever know and once you do, if they say no, then it's your choice.    

A long time ago... my mentor from my first career... (you all remember him, right)... made the comment that it was harder for women to climb the success ladder and gain the same respect as men.  At that time, women really didn't hold executive positions as much, although now, times have changed.    My mantra at that time and to this day... is/was... "it's a man's world, i'm just trying to survive in it".  I realize now, that he was motivating me to not settle for being second best.   It was a challenge to prove my worth and to go for it. 

Through the years, I've gained credibility, respect and I've experienced success.   I've seen the highs and the lows of getting to this point.  I've learned from my mistakes in more ways than one.  I've had to accept hard criticisms that weren't always easy to accept.   From my view point, I figured out my strengths and my weaknesses and would say to anyone that by knowing these and working on both sides, it helped me more than anything.   Its important to write these down and to understand what you need to improve on and work at it.    Another factor is to know your job and the responsibilities that come with it and most of all, what is expected of you.   Hone your skills and become the very best that you can with all the tools you have to grow.  Don't be afraid to leave what you're comfortable with and be more aggressive.   Some of the most successful people have told me that if you don't promote yourself, nobody else will either.   Stay relevant and keep in touch with your industry.  

Another good piece of advice I was given early on was to "not sweat the small stuff".   It's so easy to say those words, but a lot harder to follow the advice of them.  If you can ever master them, you're on your way. 

I have also found along the way, that one of the biggest mistakes that we can make as employers or managers is to not appreciate our employees, to make them feel as if they have no value.    Sometimes, it's the small things that will make a difference.    Saying "thank you" and truly meaning it... is hard to come by.  We should all take note that those two words are quite powerful in the workforce.  

Every person of a team plays a role and makes a contribution.  Every employee in a company has value regardless of what their job title or pay scale may be.  Today, when you talk to someone about their value, it feels inferior, even weird and a lot of times it can be construed as degrading especially for those who have never really thought about their value.   From my own personal experiences, I found that knowing my personal worth helped me to elevate my career and find success.    

In ending my blog this week, I will leave you with this thought   There are few people who really take the time to refine their strengths and take advantage of them to their fullest potential and to know their weaknesses and to work on them.   If you don't take the time, as an employee it can leave you undervalued, underemployed and yes, even underpaid.   If you realize what your own value is, you will be more satisfied, but you will also be able to show your employer as well.    What good boss wants to lose someone of great value?

"People are definitely a company's greatest asset. It doesn't make any difference whether the product is cars or cosmetics. A company is only as good as the people it keeps. We treat our people like royalty. If you honor and serve the people who work for you, they will honor and serve you."  Mary Kay Ash

 

Outrage at The Verdict!

America reacts with shock, disgust and anger.   How could the judicial system fail this badly?  Every news outlet is carrying the same message.  

As I sit here tonight, my heart is heavy and I have all of the same emotions.    My blog this week was originally going to be on value in the workplace, which i will post later... but I feel compelled to write about my disappointment in the verdict that was rendered earlier.    As a mother,  I feel such a sense of loss because the real victim in all of this chaos -  is the child.  

I don't know these people nor do I try to cast judgement, but in this case, I feel an extreme injustice was done.   I wasn't convinced that they would convict her of the highest charge, but to allow her to walk completely free... with basically a slap on the wrist for lying and impeding an investigation is a travesty.       It's a shame and what bothers me is what message this is going to ring through-out America.     I fully believe in innocent until proven guilty, but clearly, something went wrong today.  

To watch the defense team pop the corks on champagne after winning this case was completely disgusting.   I realize that both sides of attorneys have put in countless of hours, but to have this public display shows complete lack of respect.   If they felt the need to celebrate "their win", why couldn't they have done it with a little more dignity and privacy.  

I, like many others across the country, have been somewhat intrigued by this entire case from the time the child disappeared 3 years ago to today's verdict.  There was so much media coverage on it - you felt drawn to it, even though, these type of incidents probably happen more often than not, and aren't ever publicized.   For the last month, I have tuned in to see the trial updates trying to understand what could have possibly happened.   Anytime, a child is involved, its like a dagger has been inflicted into the heart - whether you know them or not.  It's hard not to have any emotion or to not care.

Through-out the trial, I've discussed my views on this case with several of my friends.   Actually, we've had on-going debates about the evidence, the prosecution's approach and of course, the crazy and unbelievable stories that the defense put forth.  Everybody had different theories and ideas, but even with the difference in opinions, we all believed she was guilty.   Everybody saw that there was no smoking "gun" but felt that the prosecution had enough evidence to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that she clearly carries the guilt of the child being gone - especially if you use common sense.

What puzzles me tonight is how these 12 jurors came to the verdict that they did?   It was almost if their mind was already made up before they got in the courtroom.   The other question I have... is how will they lay down to sleep at night,  knowing that they allowed her to go free.  

Based on the testimony and the media coverage, a child is missing and the mother does not report it for 31 days, yet, she goes out partying, drinking and never once mentioning the child.   She never showed one ounce of grief or sense of loss for her child based on the testimony.  The child's remains were found in a swamp.  How does this happen?   Its something that I simply cannot fathom.   If it were an accident, how can you NOT respect your child enough to provide a proper burial?   To.. throw them out like they were garbage is the most senseless and cruel thing I've ever heard.  How does a jury of 12 NOT connect the dots?  How does a jury of 12 NOT use common sense in the evidence presented?  

When the verdict was rendered, watching, I was angry.   She smiled like a cheshire cat knowing that she had just gotten away with murdering her own child.   I posted on Facebook my shock and watched as other comments came in expressing the same anger, shock and just disbelief.  After I got home from work... I found that everyone across the nation, was feeling the same emotions.   Our judicial system failed today.

I can only pray that she is NOT allowed to make any money off of this - that America will not engage in "paying" her for a story or movie.   By "rewarding her monetarily", would be the second travesty that occurs in all of this.  

As the mother lays in her jail cell tonight, all I can personally hope is that the nightmares continue to haunt her until she has her real judgement day.   One day... she definitely will have it and at that time, there will be justice for the child.  

Red, White and Blue - Standing Tall and True!

And I'm proud to be an American,
where at least I know I'm free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.

And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.

Happy Birthday, America!  Red, White and Blue, standing tall and true!  As the dog days of summer begin, it truly is one of my favorite times of year.  Mind you, not because of the rising temperatures, either.   There is something very moving about a country coming together once a year to celebrate our nation's birth.   Celebrations all across America from small towns to big cities will include pagentry, patriotism and fellowship.  Firework extravaganza's, parades, political rallies, BBQ's, pool time, watermelon, homemade ice cream and more... family and friends will come together for fun, laughter and gratefulness that we live in the land of the free and home of the brave.  

Every time I hear Lee Greenwood's version of God Bless the USA, tears well up in my eyes.   The lyrics and the message of this song truly represent what America is all about to me.   There are many other songs that are played through-out the day, but for me, this is the one that I feel moved by every single time.  

Our forefathers signed the Declaration of Independence in 1776 and John Adams wrote a letter to his wife, Abigail, the day prior,  that it would become a day of great pride, respect and celebrated by succeeding generations as a great festival.  He declared that it should be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires and Illuminations from one end of this continent to the other.   He had such an insight to know that the cost to the United States to maintain and defend her freedom, her declaration would not come without a cost.

As I think about his thoughts in this letter and how our country has united and come together as a nation, I feel a connection to the past and to our history.  Growing up, at one time or another, we all  had to memorize part of the preamble.   

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness."  Declaration of Independence

There are some things that your history teachers taught you that have stayed with you.  

It goes without saying, that you cannot celebrate the fourth of July without thinking about all of the men and women in uniform.  It doesn't get more American than that!   Those who are sacrificing and serving their country, along with their families, so that we may all enjoy the freedoms and liberties on the homeland.   Holidays are especially hard on military families and it always touches me in a deep and profound way when we show respect to those who willingly serve our great country.
  

One of my fondest memories of this holiday was when I had taken my parents on a trip to Branson some  years ago.  Both of my parents loved going there and seeing the shows.  It always made me feel so good to take them.   We were at one of the shows where they were doing a special "fourth" program and they asked all of the military to stand.  My dad who was a veteran, having served in the US Airforce...  proudly stood with a whole room full of others.   They sang a complete tribute  -- the Armed Forces medley --- Army, Airforce, Marines, Navy... and tears sprang to my Dad's eyes and to many of those standing.   I looked at him and smiled and his only words were... Be Proud.   Somehow in that moment, I understood what being an American was all about in a very different and personal way than I ever had before.   I looked around at all of these different men and women standing, each with pride in their heart for a country they had served and one that they truly loved.  It was probably one of the most patriotic moments I've ever felt.    

So, on Monday, I will join my Clampett family and we'll join the rest the nation celebrating America's birthday.  We will give it the best pomp and circumstance we have in us and we'll let our fireworks shine brightly... and far in the distance, we'll see even bigger ones and know that our neighbors are standing just as tall and showing their red, white and blue too.

Have a blessed and safe holiday!  

From the lakes of Minnesota,
to the hills of Tennessee.
Across the plains of Texas,
From sea to shining sea.

From Detroit down to Houston,
and New York to L.A.
Well there's pride in every American heart,
and its time we stand and say.

That I'm proud to be an American,
where at least I know I'm free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.

And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.

Remembering my Dad!

All through the year, we have holidays and special days that mean something to all of us.   We all celebrate them in different ways and we all have different ones that we celebrate.   This week-end, across the nation, many families will be celebrating Father's Day on Sunday.   Father's Day, along with Mother's Day, is a day for children to show their parents extra love.   It's a day of celebration, honor and even memory.

My Daddy and Me

 For me...my dad is no longer with us, so Father's Day is now about remembering and celebrating his spirit and memory.

As many of you know, I lost both my parents within 6 months of each other.  Its still raw and there's not a day that goes by that I don't think of them and miss them both.   It will be 2 years in July since my dad's passing.   I know in my heart he is in a better place and that he's watching over me.   It still doesn't make it any easier and even though time has helped with some of the grief, there are still moments when it hits... and the floodgates open.

It's uncontrollable and yet, somehow, comforting at the same time.  

I don't ever want to forget what my Dad looked like or forget any of the memories that I hold near and dear in my heart.  He was a very gentle, kind and simple man.  He worked hard and he provided for his family.  He loved sports and during his high school and college years, he was quite good.   He loved the Rebels and even though we may have had a losing season in every sport, he was loyal.  He loved to garden and his thumb was green.   Every summer, the bigger he could make his garden, the better he loved it.  He loved to ride the backroads and just enjoy nature.  He was a hunter and an avid fisherman.    He was also a very quiet man... which is so unlike my mother or even me.   He hardly ever raised his voice, but when he did, you knew it was important.

Once you have lost a parent, it's like you've lost part of you.   You feel unbalanced.  Losing both, you feel like you're alone as far as wisdom, advice and just knowing you always have somewhere to go if you needed.   (That's how I feel anyway...).

 Since his passing,  I've thought a lot about him.  I've realized what I cherished the most and it was the quiet moments we spent watching the Rebels, the time out in his backyard watching the hummingbirds, the many memories of him in the garden making sure that every plant got adequate attention, the gentle laugh when he was telling a story, his love for boiled peanuts... and the list goes on and on.   I've looked back on my childhood and even in adult life and know that I was one of the lucky ones.  

For 45 years, I was incredibly blessed.   I don't know that Father's Day or any other holiday will get any easier, but I do know that I won't ever forget and that his memory and spirit are still in my heart each and every day.   Life is a precious and fragile gift.   If you still have your father... spend Sunday with him and make a memory.   Life, after all, is about memories.

Happy Father's Day, Dad.  I know you're the brightest star in heaven shining down on me each and every day!